5.30.2007
this isn't supposed to happen
Yesterday was craptastic as days go and I was fully prepared to discuss my displeasure here, but then something came up that made everything seem less important. This isn't the first time that this has happened, it's probably not even the second time. And it seems that it will always be Tyrone to call me with the bad news. He's a good friend like that because it's hard hearing bad news, but it's just as difficult, maybe even more so, to give bad news.
Tyrone called me after I didn't respond to his IM. He said "Joe is either a bigger bastard than I thought or he's dead." All anyone knew when he called me was that there was a fatal motorcycle accident on Monday and that Joe wasn't answering his phone. {Of course, Joe also told Tyrone, Suzanne and Mandy that he was tired of everyone calling him anytime there was a fatal motorcycle accident between West Point and Hampton. He said he wouldn't answer his phone for four days the next time there was a motorcycle accident. That was Joe. He was loud and obnoxious and a jackass, but Joe is Joe and that's why everyone liked him.} Shortly after his call Emily called me. I thought she was calling about this because I forgot she was out of town. He called back while I was on the phone with Emily and confirmed that Joe died.
It's too strange, like a bad joke. He was at Mandy's wedding (it was 9 days ago!) and we all had a good time. We were probably the loudest at the table. We laughed at inappropriate moments throughout the course of the reception. He was sitting next to me, telling me about the first time he met Mandy's husband (then fiance) Mike and he made this face and I totally spit the iced tea I was drinking all over the place. Joe, of course, found this to be hysterical, and it really was. We toasted Ben, who died in 2005, and danced to "Sweet Home Alabama" knowing that he would have been at the wedding were he still alive today.
The below picture is from the wedding. The DJ played the Electric Slide. Joe was doing a much better job dancing to it than I was - I can't even remember the last time I danced this dance. Tyrone is in the foreground, I don't know why he wasn't dancing at this point. At one point, "Super Freak" was played and all of us who had seen Little Miss Sunshine (which I think was everyone but Suzanne) started dancing like the end of the movie. At that point, everyone around us gave us strange looks, danced away and gave us space.
 The crazy thing about all of this is that we were all together very recently. Joe was very much alive. He loved riding his motorcycle. And let's face it, you absolutely have to love your life if you own/ride motorcycles. Motorcycles are not for the faint of heart, or life for that matter.
I didn't go to work today because I'm still trying to deal with this. I didn't really sleep well and my entire head hurts. When I called in to ask for a personal day, my supervisor asked if we were close friends. We really weren't close, but we were still friends.
But now I'm starting to wonder what "close" means? Is a "close" friend someone you call everyday, once a week, twice a month?
Or does "close" mean that you are affected in some way when you learn that something tragic has happened to that friend?Labels: trying to deal
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